Hey buddy, got a nickel?

The giving of alms is considered a virtuous deed in many religions of the world today. The act of donating to those less-fortunate and the needy can even be seen by some as being divine. In a less religion-driven and more practical context, a couple of rupees here and there may not mean anything to the giver, while to the givee (I like the word 'givee', but the English language refuses to show any cognizance to it, so substitute it for 'accepter', if you prefer), it could mean the difference between something to eat and an empty stomach, being burnt away by gastric juices.

And there ends the ethical side of this piece, so for the squeamish among you, a click of the back button or a swift scroll down or up, is recommended. For the rest, here comes the disclaimer.

I am not raising myself on a pedestal and looking down contemptuously on those less fortunate than me.
I am not poking fun at people to whom life has dealt a difficult hand.
I am not turning preachy and saying "get a job and stop begging!!" either.

What I am however, endeavouring to do is to compile and hammer out a set of observations and things I've picked up and seen over time to create a little list (by no means complete nor definitive) of "begging techniques" I have witnessed. As a wannabe journalist, it would actually be wrong of me not to document all this, so again, easy with the brickbats.

Before "techniques" came about, there was the very simple and basic statement of need, accompanied by an outstretched palm facing the sky. No pretense here, no emotional blackmail, merely, expressing the fact that one was in need and required a bit of a monetary push. Polio is one of those conditions that is rampant in this country of ours and consequently, a number of streetdwellers are affected by it. Similar to the basic statement of need is the demonstration of need. Through this, one would walk up and show one's affected limb and ask for the aforementioned monetary push.

Soon after, came the facilitated tears method, whereby a mother would pinch her infant, causing the little one to explode into tears and the sight of a weeping infant would induce the extraction of a bit of pocket change from the wallets of the alms-giver and into the mother's hand. Bada bing bada boom!

Coercion through spiritual sentiment is next on this list, with "Allah ke naam pe de-de" or "Bhagvaan tumhara bhala karega" topping the list of most-heard phrases. This method seems to try and create within the potential giver, a feeling that blessed will they be, should they cough up some dough. In my humble opinion, this is where emotional blackmail began kicking in into the "techniques".

Moving into the present and looking at some slightly more "contemporary techniques", there's the insistence of nourishment method, which involves children insisting that they will buy food and often, specifying just what they'll buy. This probably stems from the widespread notion (misguided or not, it's not my place to comment) that alms are swiftly spent on alcohol or a quick fix of crack. Furthering this "technique", is the medicine packaging method, which usually involves an empty aluminium and plastic wrapper, used usually to package tablets and capsules. Said wrapper is shown by the potential alms acceptor to the potential giver as a way of establishing that one requires the money for medicines. Again, it is not the purpose of this piece to judge, but there is no way of telling where the wrapper emerged from and whether the person actually needs the medication.

Next up, are some of the stranger methods I have observed. The first of these is the scare shitless through abuse method, which involves loud and raucous abusive screams aimed at the potential giver as a way to guilt/scare them into making with the moolah. An example of this is screams of " <Expletive> Bhooke ke pet par laath maarta hai, " and such like. While certainly being a novel method, this one does not appear to have the promise of a high success rate. Next up is the swandive method, which presents itself in the form of little kids diving at the feet of potential givers and not letting go until they've either been kicked off or given some money. This is a dangerous method (from the kids' point of view) and without nimble footwork (from the potential giver), one will probably end up having to pay up to prevent the ignominy of trampling all over a child.

Finally, and possibly the most bizarre "technique" of all is the earthquake method. This is usually executed while the potential giver is in some sort of vehicle, generally a taxi. Potential acceptor will position oneself next to the door and attempt to use the statement of need method. If that fails, one will grab the car door in tandem with an accomplice grabbing the boot of the car. They will both proceed to rock the car from side to side until it irritates the driver of the car and he/she is forced to get out of the car and make them disperse. It is unclear as to what exactly this particular method achieves, but suffice it to say that experiencing this method once, is enough.

And that brings this little list to an end. Additions, comments and criticism will be most appreciated.