Laydeeeez and Gentle-nerds...
This following communiqué will not delve into where I have been the last four (nearly) months. Neither will it say anything about the fact that reporting kicks ass or about the BMC, to whom I am yet to establish myself as a complete menace. It won't even talk about the fact that life imitates art and that by "art" I mean Scott Adams' Dilbert and that by "life" I mean my life and that the basis of this imitation is that an aspect of my job has me working for a micro-managing person who isn't too far removed from the pokey-haired boss Dilbert has.
No, this communiqué is one of rejoice.
Of grateful thanking.
Of hailing the Messiah.
Of faith in the cause.
October 2, 2008 will go down in history as a golden day for man, for it was the day we were all saved. Believers and disbelievers alike were shown the evil curse of smoking for what it really is, as it was banished from the country's landscape forever. Moist-eyed with pride and thankfulness, citizens applauded the saviour and lit candles and lamps and offered prayers to thank the Lord for sending this ethereal soul their way.
No longer will bluish grey swirls of aromatic smoke cloud man's vision, even in bars and clubs, so he can get back to what's really important. No more will his vision be clouded preventing him from getting a nice glance at some tasty cleavage or a particularly juicy ass. No longer will that horrible demon of "choice" be allowed to enter the mindset of man. The country is so much richer for having that beast slain.
Citizens with their candles expressed their admiration for the saviour and beseeched him to rid the world of other demons as well. They prayed for him to dispatch alcohol to the depths of hell. They pleaded with him to end the existence of heavy metal music forever. They begged of him to destroy all films that weren't Rated U (Or G in some countries); in fact, some went as far as to say destroy all cinema and seditious television programming like The Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy, WWE, 24 and so many other names that sent shivers down the spines of the citizens.
The saviour smiled, closed his eyes and nodded. "It shall be so," he said softly and added, "But first I must return to continue my war on that son of the Devil called 'choice'. I shall return soon." And with that he disappeared without the customary puff of smoke. Citizens cheered and clapped in adulation.
Thanks a whole whole lot, jackass!
3 comments:
Tell it to Roy Castle matey boy.
I never had a problem with people smoking in public areas, but I do take issue when people compare the smoking ban to banning alcohol.
Smoking should be a personal choice, but every time a smoker lights up in an enclosed area they're making a choice on behalf of all the other people in the room. You can't screw your liver through passive drinking, but there have been a number of cases of serious illness or even death caused by passive smoking.
Personally I believe the threat posed by passive smoking is far too minimal to warrant a ban, but I can understand the reasoning behind such a law.
I agree with Jonjo. Drinking alcohol does not hurt anyone else but yourself in the absence of stupidity. As a non drinker I have no strong feelings about "saving" alcohol, but I am not going to try to stop people enjoying themselves.
As Jonjo said, smoking is a completely different case. It can harm people through the simple and vital act of breathing. However, it is still a choice.
West
I've yet to see anyone actually implementing this rule anywhere. Sure, the signs are up all over the place, just like the ones outside the night clubs in the suburbs, but there isn't really anyone out there catching people who smoke in public. This is, in my opinion another publicity campaign, much like the anti-gutkha drive that happened a few years ago. Give it a few months and the lobbyists from every tobacco company will make this law redundant. And things will go back to the sad status quo where 8 year old kids can buy cigarettes and puff away.
I'm not anti smoking, being an occasional smoker myself. I think it's a personal choice. Sure, if one person's personal freedom encroaches on someone else, the Health minister can put a stop to it. But ONLY in clearly defined terms. I agree partly with Jonjo that anyone who smokes in the company of others can potentially harm them through passive inhaling. But I've yet to see someone really be as sadistic to smoke in the presence of someone else, knowing that it's affecting them. There are a lot of sympathetic smokers out there who put out their flames when they know it bothers someone.
I would be glad if Ramadoss actually took an interest in the deplorable health conditions of children in this city, most conditions that have nothing to do with cigarettes. Like malnutrition, despicable hospital conditions, inexperienced doctors and countless other problems. Deal with the fucker that transplanted the wrong kidney before you want to deal with my lungs.
-Darius
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